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“The prevalence of casual sex is actually kind of dubious,” Dr. Jaymee Kelly, a psychotherapist in New York, tells Bustle. “I think it actually leads to a lot of issues. But at least, when you do have casual sex, you’re much less likely to have anxiety around it. And this is what we can all do for ourselves.” “This is exactly why having casual sex is just kind of worrying,” Dr. Michael Gray, a certified sex therapist, tells Bustle. “There’s a really strong potential for problem to ensue.” If we don’t know the person we’re shacking up with well enough to safeguard ourselves against potential drama, and if they don’t know us well enough to protect us from unsafe situations, it just leaves us with really undefined outcomes. However, “if you’re truly both healthy, you should be able to trust one another,” Dr. Kelly says. “So, in that sense, casual sex can be beneficial.”
Here, we take a look at some of the main reasons why having casual sex isn’t good for you. Is casual sex bad for your relationship?
Could casual sex be responsible for why relationship breakups are becoming so common?
There’s no harm in having casual sex unless you have low self-esteem, lack social skills, or have a short fuse, Dr. Gray says. “But at the same time, I don’t really feel like it’s a good thing, either,” he says. “If you just roll up to bed with someone who’s kind of in your general proximity, and they don’t reciprocate or it’s not a good fit, I think that can cause issues for your relationship. But if you just go home with someone without having spent a lot of time getting to know them, I think that’s much less likely to be the case.”

If you have low self-esteem, can be guilty of self-sabotaging your relationships, often can be too impatient — i.e., just going for someone first, and very frequently, the hookup ends a relationship. “If you have things in your past that have taught you not to trust, if you over-commit, then having someone you’ve just met lying down with you may just scare the crap out of you,” Dr. Kelly says. “They might never stay. Or it might turn out that they’re not good for you and you’re just essentially getting burned.”
But Dr. Gray says that with time,
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In theory, having casual sex can damage your relationships with friends and family, cause you to have more stress, and hurt your chances of reproducing. But these claims have been largely debunked by science. The biggest drawback with casual sex, according to a GQ study, is that it rarely brings you lasting emotional connections. In fact, for women, hooking up with multiple guys at once may cause feelings of a deeper enmeshment within the group, which can be a negative change in their relationships with family and friends.
On the other hand, casual sex can save you money. If you spend a little time on dating apps like Tinder or Bumble, you’ll find plenty of guys who are down for a no-strings-attached first date.
Don’t be afraid to ask what a casual sex partner’s sex preferences are and if he is comfortable with being polyamorous. And don’t worry about scoping out whether he is single and looking — you can do that any time by using the apps above. The real beauty of casual sex is just getting laid.
What are the risks of casual sex?
Having casual sex isn’t always a huge deal — we’ve all had our fair share of duds and sex comes with risk. But when you start down the casual sex path, there is no denying that you’ll run into potential complications. How do you know if your sex life is casual or if it’s “casual sex” that turns into a relationship? It’s a risk that you don’t realize you’re taking into account when you hook up.
Even the seemingly harmless — or at least, not very threatening — act of meeting someone and having sex without ever even having met them can result in these problems.
When it comes to casual sex, you never know how anyone else will react to it. Are your hookup person’s morals on the same page as yours? What about oral? Are you both feeling sexually aroused?
Are you fully communicating and respecting each other’s boundaries?
Your sex life and any other details about your relationship — the ones that are hard to type out to a casual sex person on a first date — can end up getting lost in translation.
This brings us to the situation where your plan can turn into reality and it’s not at all what you meant for it to be.
If you’re under the impression that you’re not interested in someone because you’ve just had sex with him, then he may think that he can “hook you up” with

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